Tension.

i need to seriously start wearing my glasses whenever i find them at my mom's house.
i can just feel the tension lately behind my eyes.


it doesnt help ive been stressed.

so stupid out of it, that i legit had a bloodsugar drop today. today was the worst i've had it in a long time.
i couldnt stand, threw up and couldnt see anything.
i do not miss laying on my bathroom floor shaking

im so glad i have a best friend. she knew the second i told her i didnt feel good.
she got me in the car and home as fast as possible. made me food and such.
it was just terrible.

BUT! while all that was happening,
boy texted me. when i finally felt better enough, with the help of sugar pills i got from a housemate,
i checked my phone because i figured Matt had texted me
but IT WAS MY BOYFRIEND.
i started jumping and yelling
and then i had to sit my ass on the kitchen floor because my sugar was still stupid low.


things are out there now. in the open. it didn't go at all the way i thought it would
not yet.
i keep telling myself to just wait, wait until things sink in, and then that'll be it.
this wasn't how this past month was suppose to go. i wanted good news to give i wanted to be able to say, baby things were okay, i missed you masssiveelyy and it was terrible, but i was alright, i kept busy aced all my stuff, finished my game, cleaned, and just was focused while nothing bad happened.


Karma, or Allah didn't feel like it should be that way.
hah allah. YEABOI.

anywhooo im just going to remain worried and stressed.
its 5am again.ii need sleep so bad

im gunna go snuggle and reread over some texts. including old saved ones that make me smile.

these 2 weeks went by pretty fast. they weren't THAT bad.
i suppose its a mindset.
well. nnow it's behind me.