I feel disgusting.
I could shower for days and still feel gross.

I hate letting people under my skin.
I hate regretting giving people certain emotions of mine.

Being with a random isnt like this because I could care less and there's a part of my emotions turned off.
Being with someone I care about means alot to me. Ive always given it significance.  My bad.

I always hate when I end up wishing I hadnt done it with attached emotion.

I'm having a completely miserable day and I feel disgusting.
Noone ever wants to stay around after a little while.
I'm tired of having to try to make people stay.
Just  would like someone who whole heartedly, undoubtedly wants to stay.

Yeap

Im feeling good personally.
Towards myself.

But thats it.
I feel very alone in every aspect and its even worse than seriously being single and alone.
What makes this worse is the fact that im suppose to have someone else with me, but they're absent. So I'm alone in everything when I shouldnt be.

So much worse than being alone when I should be alone.

So many damn red flags.
Ya know,  I do actually know that I'm stupid for 'ignoring' all of them.

I date too strongly for wbat seems like everyone. I'll eventually find someone who dates just as hard in return, has no problem with compromise and looks at things as a 'we' or 'us' instead of him by himself.

Ohhhlife.